Category: positive mindset

Hey Mama!

I attended a networking event where I got the opportunity to share the mission of Mommy Making Moves. If you didn’t know, our mission is to help moms keep sight of their goals after motherhood.

The response from the crowd was amazing considering, I was probably the only mom in the event. The faces of the women who didn’t have kids lit up.

They were shocked that a working married mom looked like me. Even the men guys bought into the mission, sharing that they knew a lot of women that have abandoned their own dreams and bodies to focus on their kids.

It was eye opening. Here I was just thinking MMM was about moms and the mission really impacts how people view moms.

The world thinks kids = dreams lost for parents

We know moms are amazing, but so often we don’t share our knowledge of how we balance our goals and still keep up with our kid’s development. Seems like all the not so good parents get all the attention. The Facebook Rant Room was created for moms to share helpful info, challenges, opportunities and successes.

I get it, motherhood looks hard. Ok, it is challenging at times but I don’t think it’s anymore challenging than someone working at a job for 20 years. That sounds miserable as hell to me. At least our kids give us kisses, grow up and get out.

We have to change that. So many women are opting out of having kids because they don’t see women that are joyfully juggling their goals and family. I know that feeling. My mom was a stressed out mom. Mainly because she didn’t have a lot of help. That lead me to never wanting to have kids. I realized that it wasn’t the kids I didn’t want. It was the stress I didn’t want.

With the right support system moms can achieve their full potential. And we don’t have to neglect our kids to do it.

In the meantime, keep pushing mama. Someone (besides your kids) needs to see you make your dreams come true.

Peace & Lessons

Over the years, I watched my mom go from a Jewel-Osco cashier to Bank Teller, to a Home Loan Officer. At the end of her life, she was making more than 90k. If it wasn’t for that damn colon cancer, I’m sure she would have clocked that coveted 6 figures before 40.

That’s pretty damn good for a single mom of three with no college degree.

Hands down my mother was the ultimate hustler. Honestly, many of the single mothers I know are driven on a level of purpose regular folks will never understand. They feel like they have to do the work for the absent parent. I imagine that’s exactly how my mom felt. Single mothers can teach us the true value of HUSTLE.

My mother always had a job and a vision for her next move. The Janel motto was, “If you want it, work for it.”

When she made the decision to buy a home I remember it vividly. She told me and my younger brother we would have to stay with our Grandmother while she saved money. She moved into a studio apartment close to her job. I now understand that she needed to work multiple jobs to save money and wanted to be sure we were with a trusted relative while she worked non-stop. There is nobody more trustworthy than Granny.

She moved into a studio apartment close to her job so work multiple jobs to save money and wanted to be sure we were with a trusted relative while she worked non-stop. There is nobody more trustworthy than Granny.

As a mother, I know that had to be tough decision for her to separate herself from her kids. Her goals were much bigger than her comfort zone. Luckly, she had an amazing support system that supported her goals.

During this time, my mother became a licensed Real Estate Agent, worked at a retail store and held down her 9 – 5 as a home Loan Officer. Can you say GRINDMODE.

She was focused on buying her family a home and she did it. 2 years later, we moved into a 2 bedroom, three floor townhouse – not far from my Grandmother’s house. Me and my brother were all too geeked to get our own rooms. The backyard was huge with a deck and two car garage. She was 31 years old.

Watching my mother do what was necessary to give us stability taught me a valuable lesson. Sometimes, we must be unstable to experience stability. She could have just said, I’ll stay with my mother since she has empty rooms. Nope, she wanted her own. She wanted to prove to herself that she didn’t need a man, handouts or a degree to purchase a home. All she needed was faith, focus and a crazy drive to succeed.

Her work ethic serves as the blueprint for my life. In the short 19 years I had with her she proved that statics mean nothing when you’re willing to sacrifice and COMMIT.

So my question to you is, do your kids know what you’re working towards?

If not, maybe it’s time you let your kids in on your vision.

Let them know you are building a legacy that they will one day takeover. I’m forever thankful for sacrifices my Mom had for her life and her kids. That vision gave me an advantage in life.

Now, I’m taking our family legacy to the next level.

Where are you taking your family?

Obstacles happen to EVERYONE!! You’re obstacle is unique because you’re unique but there is nothing in this world that’s hasn’t been done already. God has all the solutions because he forsee’s the stroms in your life. He gives us all choices and those choices take us on our path.

We can learn the hard way or we can heed the advice given to us by Advisors that have conquered obstacles, trust our gut and lean on God for direction. As the hip hop profit Future says “Ain’t No way Around It.”

Be your own magic. The only difference between you and someone that made it out the storm is they kept going.

You are not alone sweetheart.

Keep pushing past your obstacles the blessing at the end of the turbulent rainbow is well worth the fight.

Our ability to parent is all about how we perceive the responsibility. When we “want” to be a parent kids are the greatest gift ever. If we don’t “want” to be a parent they may seem like the greatest burden ever.

This is the number one reason why I don’t push parenting on people. You really have to fully understand how your life is going to change – and be ok with that. #KidsAreAGift #BeautifulParenting

God don’t make no garbage. – Somebody’s Grand Mama

Beyonce’ isn’t Sheryl Sandburg. Sheryl Sandburg isn’t Oprah. Oprah isn’t Issa Rae. We’re all extraordinary at something! Yes, even you. That’s exactly why wishing for someone else’s blessing is a pointless headache we give ourselves. We can’t be them, no matter how boss bishy they are.

Craving another woman’s loving husband, wondering why we can’t have a successful business or cursing God for not giving us a trust fund (that one is for me) will not get us closer to the life we want. The only thang that can do that hunny is FEARLESSNESS, FOCUS and FAITH.

Fear of failure keeps us comfortable, average, mediocre and stuck. Nothing bossy about being stuck doing some mess you weren’t meant to do. Life is too short to live wondering.

We stick to what we know and what we’ve been told we’re good at because we know what to expect from our actions. Take a Risk!

What would you do if you knew you wouldn’t fail? 

It’s not until we go beyond our comfort zone that we can experience EXTRAORDINARY results. Yes we will often fail, but the lesson in failure is knowing what to do right next time 

We ain’t no average bishes! 

#BeBold #PursuePain#KeepPushing #YouWillRecover #StayConsistent